Ever hear the saying… treat others how you want to be treated? I don’t know anyone who doesn’t say this… I say it all the time. But how about, Asked or tell others how you want to be treated– I sure don’t hear a lot of people say that…
We live in an era where unless you say how you feel on facebook, twitter or some social media people don’t really ask how you are, or communicate much at all… as in “old school” talking on the phone for hours or take the time to write a letter. Most people are busy with their lives and really don’t make time for one another (at least this is my anecdotal view). People are so busy.. working, taking care of kids, cooking, Making sure the world is turning. Om I’m blabbing now… back to the point.
SO… Why do you allow yourself to be treated how you don’t want to be? Or even why do you allow others to be treated in a mal form?
I can guess… you don’t want to cause trouble… right?
Well… I have some news… There is something called speaking out, Ever heard of it? LOL (not being mean… your probably saying, don’t write to me like that!) Well, good for you if you are!
Speaking up, saying how you want to be treated, telling them your needs, wants, thoughts, and feelings to someone else is telling them how, what, when, where, why you want things done that way. The way I see it, if someone doesn’t tell me, they can’t be mad at me because
1. I cannot read minds
2. I cannot read minds
3. There is no reason to be mad at me if I did something you did not like if you did not tell me you do not like that… How AM I SUPPOSE to know?
4. I cannot read minds and
5. I’m not a mind reader. I think i got my point across.
There is however, self accountability, meaning…if you feel or KNOW you have offended, hurt or made someone mad, follow up with your instincts. Ask the person to please…Don’t be mad when I ask because I’m actually asking. A way you can say this is… “Hey, I’m going to ask you something, but I want to listen to your answer, not want to have to guess or move away because of anger.” Sometimes people will say… yeah man or wo-man, you did this and this made me feel or think…. or sometimes people will say, nope. And if they say no, you have to take that for face value. They cannot (well, they can, but not cool if they do) and say hey your an idiot and you didn’t know…. You did your part to ask.
SO… again, The next time you are not being treated how you want to be treated, tell the person. Don’t go all ghetto talking about… uhg.. you Beep beep beep you.. you are beep.. non-of that kids…
Be open and calm about it… people respond better when you are calm (because they are listening and not trying to avoid the drama).
I hope you speak up. How do you like to be treated?
Smile (if you want)