Holidays… Need I say more?
It is suppose to be a time for happiness, cheerful moments, and creating memories. However, not all families go through these “happy times.” For some its dreadful moments, avoidance of childhood memories, and ongoing regrets. And what I can tell you is this, It is what you make of it. Also, the following…
- You can kick and scream, through a tantrum and act like you are five or six all over again, but what will that get you? Maybe being ignored, or hollered at and being told you are acting like a five or six year old.
- You can scream, argue and throw things around. But that will only get you a broken vase/plates/brown windows. You can also hurt others including yourself.
- You can make horrible food. But you have to sit down and eat it too…
- You could even avoid the holidays in general, but you will miss out on what you can change and make better.
Like I said, Not everyone likes the holidays. Moreover, sometimes as an adult they may seem like a waste of time when you are busy making YOU happen.
BUT! Its not an everyday thing. They are the holidays. Which means, a vacation, from your everyday life to make more memories with the ones you love or in some cases choose to deal with.
Here are some tips to get through this Holiday season:
- Use the Letter “I” (I think, I feel) you speak for you… You are the only one that knows your thinking. I’m pretty sure you cannot read someones mind. If you can good luck!
- With out communication, you cannot express your self in a DECENT manner.
- People prefer to hear communication in a calm voice more than violent acts or screaming.
- Communication allows for you to release these “ghost” that have haunting you from a young age.
- Self- Control
- Making sure you are aware of your body…i.e. drinking. You can always communicate better when you have control of what you want to say.
- Only you have self control of you, no one else. There isn’t someone pulling your strings unless you let them.
- Being aware of what other are saying, hearing them and reciprocate without being violent.
- Know that everyone is not in the same situation that you are in.
- Follow up with your family; of the family circumstances.
- Tell your family what is going on with you. I’m very sure they would like to know. Some families tend to be resentful of the wonderful things you are doing, include them into your life.
- Be there.
- Learn people’s boundaries.
- Inform your family members what your boundary is and WHY you choose to have that specific boundary.
- Give them time to adjust and understand your choices.
- Don’t feel like you cannot say no, even if it gets someone mad. You need to take care of you… communicate about it. You can also say yes, you don’t always have to say no. You get where I’m going with this?
Smile (If you want).